GU Comics by: Woody Hearn

I have a problem. I want to see Cloverfield but I hate going to the movie theater. I want to see Cloverfield NOW, but I'm an agoraphobic hermit that refuses to even drive past a theater on a big opening weekend.

Okay okay so saying I'm agoraphobic might be stretching it a bit. But I really do loathe the idea of going to a movie theater. The tiniest sounds pull me right out of the movie. I can hear other people breathing and whispering, slurping and crinkling their candy bags. My shoes stick the floor. The jackass behind me keeps bumping my seat. Even when I go to a theater with stadium seating for a movie with a nearly empty house an 8'5" person always sits right in front of me. Needless to say my theatre experiences to date have NOT been spectacular and I paid for the "honor".

What I need is a friend that runs a theater that'll let me sneak in after hours and watch the movie... after the floors have been thuroughly cleaned of course.

[ discuss ] - replies ( 65 ) last post by: Willarow